March 12, 2008

  • Wellbutrin Withdrawl

    Having started halving my Wellbutrin,  300mg XL,  not scored, for going on two weeks now,  I feel okay.  A bit out of touch and stuff,  actually I'm not sure how I feel.   I haven't been blogging because weird things would be coming out, like when I wanted to write about how much the cracks in the walls are bothering me,  (that was a couple of days ago) and the spots of dirt here and there which I usually don't notice.  They were everywhere the other day.

    I also want to be a published writer but I have no drive nor discipline and half of me really doesn't care anymore anyway.   It's all too much work.

    I'm gonna stop the Wellbutrin for no reason.  It wasn't the cause of the migraines anyhow, but why take it if I don't need it....    I'm not sure if I need it or not.  I won't know that until I'm completely off it will I?  Well that's just it then, isn't it.   It's all too much work.

    I'm not depressed, but a bit confused and overwhelmed at all the things going on in the world , not to mention in my life,  which is pretty much nothing going on,   chores backing up and causing me obsessive woe,  but I'm not jumping out windows or imagining death scenarios and I'm not curled up in a ball weeping in bed....

    I'm not depressed or anxious, but prettymuch I guess overwhelmed and I wouldn't care if I did die right now, at this point.  I'd welcome seeing my mother.  I'm not sad or depressed though,  just apathetic.

    Everything is just so much work...  I hate feeling overwhelmed.   How much of it is Wellbutrin withdrawal and how much is just me....

    Perhaps I should just keep taking it....

    Only time will tell..

    Hell,  this is too much work...

    I think I'm gonna go to bed early cuz I'm totally bored.

Comments (5)

  • Dear Orlando,

    I, for one, enjoyed immensely your "blog about blogging" that meandered into a rambling mess. A lot of bloggers are like that. I'm sort of shameless when I blog about my life. (And I usually blog about the PAST and not the present, which frankly isn't as interesting.) I've even thought of posting entries from my old paper journals which were written for me, but since I call myself a writer, they were well written. (Or at least I thought so.)

    You could always blog about Elliot Spitzer. Everybody's doing it. I say, if the guy wants to spend time with a $5,500 an hour hooker, that's his business. But he resigned. And made the requisite public apology.

    In 2012 maybe we'll have a candidate for president who's a black transgendered gay. Oh, and who pays for $5,500 an hour hookers!

    I'd consult with my doctor about the dosage or taking you off the meds. I'm lucky I guess that I was young in the 70s where all the drug usage was just recreational. Now I don't need any drugs at all!

    Take care, and I'm sure you'll come up with content. One thing I've learned after blogging on Xanga for almost four years. I won't post if I don't have an entry ready to go. I usually post every three or four days, and I'm able to keep up with all my commenters, and drop by the blogs of those, like you, whom I haven't "seen" in a while. You know, just by posting something online, we're in essence "self publishing". I've been posting my poetry online since 2000, and almost have all of them online. For anyone who's interested, all my "work" is online and available for free. Maybe if I were younger I'd want to publish in reality rather than on the web, but when one gets a nice comment, it makes up for the fact I'm not getting paid.

    Michael F. Nyiri, poet, philosopher, fool

  • I think a lot of it is due to the withdrawal. I know other people who have complained of a spacey-not all there, something is out of whack with my world feeling when going off of that and similar drugs. Hang in there, my friend!

  • well, i do hope things work out for you - i do miss your regular posts.  take care of yourself.  peace, Al

  • I kind of wonder if it isn't just an apathetic time. I have been so lethargic. Unmotivated. My willingness to improve this is still intact but my world feels like pressing walls around me. This too shall pass like gas. Ha.

  • Hang in there.. I have heard of several others that have had similar withdrawal symptoms!

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