It's Thanksgiving morning and I woke up with a headache.   It's not so bad.   It is the first time I will go out and see the Macy's Parade live after a lifetime of seeing it on television.  This is only because it is not cold.

People are coming to have dinner with us.  We are going to a restaurant.  We wanted to go to The Boathouse in Central Park where we went last year but it was booked up very early this year.   We are going to a steakhouse instead.

The people we are taking are not people I care for but I won't go into it...

Last weekend I spend the day shredding old journals from the early 80's.   All they were about was my old boyfriend and all of that up and drama,  over and over...    it was bittersweet...  I shredded about 10 journals, I've been an avid journaler since my teens and have suitcases full of them.  Little by little I have been destroying my past,  letting it go....   

Releasing the early 80s was a good thing...   I certainly have not been the happiest of campers yet most of my turmoil has been internal...  It amazes me to re see how much I used to struggle... I still struggle but things have obviously improved over the years.... I would hate to revisit some of those bad times.  I have fear about the future in this respect, but nothing specific,  just bad times that everyone must face as the consequences of life...

So why not see a parade?
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Just thought I would pass this along;   according to an article @ Jezebel.com,   the names and identities of some of the top Twitter Racist reactions to our president being re-elected are:

Ricky Catanzaro – football player at Xaverian High School in Brooklyn
Lou LaDonna – football player at West Islip High School
Kordie Girton – baseball scholarship to Indiana State University
Addison Sykes – football player at Jackson Christian Jackson, TN
Brandon Norrie – baseball player at Sickles High School Tampa, FL
Michelle Brosam – soccer player at Rider HS Wichita Falls, Texas
Cole Krut – baseball player at Beaver Falls, PA
Demi Keely – pageant girl in Carencro, Louisiana
Gabe Dutch – baseball player at Redwood HS Visalia, CA
Stehl Taylor – hockey player at Central York HS York, PA
Davis Moody – runner at Mill Creek HS Hoschton, Georgia

You can see some of the vulgar tweets and the vulgar people who tweet them in this article.

I checked out some of these people on Twitter and they actually do exist....  Then I did a little Googling about it,  it seems it's a growing topic on the Internet... 

http://jezebel.com/5958490/twitter-racists-react-to-that-nigger-getting-reelected/gallery/1?tag=racism

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The above is one example from,  Moriah Marks - mother to special needs child in ALVIN, TX
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Things must be getting back to normal for me after the hurricane. I went to see a musical show called Closer Than Ever because someone had extra tickets.

I still have no internet and am blogging by cellphone. We were lucky that the water, the East River actually stopped next door. We were the only building on our block with power but no hot water, heat or interner. Now we have heat and hot water. We've had an electric heater so it wasn't so bad.

I didn't realize how terrifying it was to see the East River breach its banks and nearly reach 2nd Ave.
Our neighbors in basement apartments were flooded out and lost everything...

I walked around in a daze not knowing if I could go to work each next day, day by day...for a few days the television had little but storm coverage...

I went to Starbucks for hours, and Barnes and Noble. To use the internet...

I felt a sense of helplessness.... I didn't know what to do....

Little by little I learned of friends and colleagues who lost a whole house, then another, most of a house and both cars washed away...

On Friday I took the train half way to work and walked the rest, and sat in cold doing nothing in a powerless office, offering my skills if needed...

On Saturday Astor Place Haircutters was open again so I got a much needed haircut.

Looking back, and on Sunday...I feel guilty for not helping more.... for not rushing down there, or even to my neighbors aid....I did ask one neighbor if she needed anything or if there was anything I could do...

I just felt so frozen... I know I will help financially with my colleagues and friends and I plan to donate money but I really feel that I acted selfishly and could have done more to help people...

I don't know why I am having these guilty feelings..I cannot lift things or carry things because of my arms and back. I was afraid of further injuring myself...

I'm having a guilty morning, I feel like a crumb...