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  • Blood Red Migraine


    At work with a borderline migraine.  It is one where I can function but am adding extra wrinkles to my forehead squinting. 

    Today is a day I feel extra strong just for NOT calling in sick.   I'm going to try to make it through the whole day,  obviously the headache,  although I am in a bit of pain,  is mild compared to what I would really call a "migraine",  I would not be typing nor sitting here nor would I even be at work if I had a true migraine.

    This one makes me think of hot blood trying desperately to squeeze itself through tiny corpuscles into my grey matter but it's blocked some how...

    My head feels full of painful black blood.

    Didn't make the blood test this morning, but wasn't late for work.

    Took asprin but my head is killing me,   like a metal band is tightening around it.

    Ouch.

  • I Have a Headache and Want to Call in Sick.

    My head hurts and my back is killing me, I assume, from standing motionless in a lead apron.  Yesterday I wore a lead apron and neck cover while I watched someone get an epidural set,  a set of 4 injections in the lower spine because of back pain.   This was done while under Xray, thus the lead suits.

    This poor patient screamed!  These needles were like 4 inches long, I kid you not.  The Dr. watched them on an Xray screen while he injected a numbing agent first, which didn't work that well, then inserted 4 needles DEEP inside on both sides of the person's lower spine,  these were just hollow needle tubes which were inserted first before the medication was squirted in.  The Dr. watched himself on the Xray screen so he wouldn't damage the spine....

    I couldn't believe how deeply these needles went into the body,  apparently there aren't any organs down there.  The patient screamed a couple of times and cried a few tears.  This was a grown woman.  God.   I asked about the shot in MY upper back for the stenosis,   the Dr. said it was probably a little less severe,  but more risk of spinal cord damage.  I think I'll suffer the discomfort a bit more before thinking about getting a steroid shot in the back.

    I have to get a blood test and was heavily thinking about staying home from work, not only does my back hurt but I have a killer headache.   I'm not going to take a sick day,  although I have plenty of time.   

    I'm going to try to get blood drawn before work and make it on time.

    Whatever is giving me this thrust against odds,  I wish I could bottle it.

    I had a delicious dinner in a nice Japanese resturant with Sean808080 and went out for drinks later on Saturday night.  The loud noise and crowded bar was overwhelming to my senses for some reason,  or at least I was aware of it. 

    I saw some interesting music videos on the big monitor. 
    I don't watch music videos very often,  and not having cable isn't an excuse as there are plenty on the new tube,  the computer monitor.

    Shit, I just typed in 'newtube.com' to see if address has been taken and it has. 

    ...The mayor's 'congestion pricing' 8 dollar toll on cars entering the city died in Albany.  Although no one said boo about oil companies, I feel strongly that they were somehow involved in this decision to let it die.
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    I wasn't going to buy the B52's cd yesterday,  until I saw that it was only $10 at Virgin. Wow, I feel sorry for the artists.   I was gonna download it for free on Limewire, but when I saw how little they make on each CD,  and they have given me many good years,  I gave them the $10 bux.  I also saw a new Moby for $10 and a 3 cd set "Destination Tokyo" for $10 as well.

    I spent 30 dollars plus tax on 3 new cd's. (actually 5 cuz of the 3 cd set)

      I like them all.
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  • Photos Of People And Celeberities

    You can't sell pix of people without permission,  except for newsworthy stuff.  But no one says I can't put them here.  Can you spot the Celebs?

     lollyboy 2humility and pride, a delicate balancebag girlfrench mumsredcan cansoccer 1Lady Miss Kier at Wigstock 2005+  life  - =testing scannerboredCahbasmcuteparanoid youth while mother attends arm bonefrench girl under white balloonsJames De la Vega  8/25/05manic 12ball back boyqIan of the Sick F*cksthe day i met spike leeIMG_0964Gita Cash

    maniquinsalesmansoccer 2aliciaistars of indiasoccer 3original guardian angel
    IMG_1715howl festival / japanese street fair, east village, nyc 8/28/05TIsh and Snooky at 33 St. Marks Place, NYC  Manic Panic 30th BirthdayDanielhowl festival / japanese street fair 8/28/05  NYCchristmas card'the people down stairs'The Divine Grace
    cowboyspunishmentmarchIMG_1979wigstock 'o5yellow balloonisn't this that actress???orpheus
    snookie and tish manic panichowl festival / japanese street fair, east village, nyc 8/28/05wigstock 'o5batttery park 3fest boy 07wredcapsz
    manic 11IMG_1722IMG_1976Bunny, bless your heart for saving WIGSTOCK!Bad Advice5helloIMG_0657
    92ylaid backIMG_0645dog boy2IMG_07148

    Does it look like a grid to you? Or is it misshapen???

  • What makes a place 'home' for you?

    A comfortable place I can retreat from the world with my stuff in it.

    I'm so dang glad it is Friday and I'm so dang glad it is a RAINY DAY and tomorrow will be a RAINY DAY TOO.

    There is a Greek parade this weekend.  I'm wondering if I shall go take photographs,  or if I will adjust my camera setting to the largest possible resolution and go look for photographs to snap with intent on selling on stock photo sites.

    I wonder if I will get up early and attempt the NY Times crossword puzzle with a nice cup of coffee and a purring cat beside me.

    I wonder if I will gather paper work and attempt to call the tax man.
    (heart skips beat)

    I sit here forcing myself to blog,  even answering the silly featured question,  placed there to inspire me when I don't know what to blog.

    I've blogged about blogging,  or not blogging but really wanting to write or say something before.   It is one of those mornings.  I yearn to write things down,  to say things,  yet I don't know what these things are.

    I have questions about life.   I have worries.  Actually worries have decreased significantly as I've learned to manuver this life through time and now spend a significant amount of time not worrying as compared to my own worrisome past.

    Yesterday I attended a visual acting workshop where I had to do stupid things in front of a group of people.   I had to walk across a large room displaying 4 separate emotions as I walked.

    First I had to identify myself visually and everyone else in the room using only gestures and everyone had to remember each other, then it was a tag like game where the "it" person in the middle of the circle had to run and tap someone's shoulder before they could identify another person with a gesture, which sent the "it" person running to tag that person before they could identify another person with a gesture and so on...   More difficult that it sounds. 

    After that was a camparison of how people walk across a room.   It was extremly interesting to study people walk,  and to pair people, believe it or not by shoes,  people wearing similar shoes and to immitate the walks of others and to see the unique rhythem of the movements in a persons gait.

    Then came the 4 walking emotions.

    All of this was totally soundless lead by a Deaf instructor.

    Then 2 people were chosen ,  pulled up front,  given a situation and told to deal with it using only gestures and facial expressions,  for instance,  two people cooking a meal, one person preparing an entree and the other preparing appetizers for an important guest and negotation over the ingredients.  

    Or one person getting asked on a date by a very handsome man and begging a friend to baby sit,  while said friend had equally good plans.

    My scenario was begging someone to borrow their car,  a very nice expensive car, and the person was a car snob not having it.

    Then we had to think for 10 minutes and create a scenario with a beginning, a middle in which a problem is identified, and an end,  using only gestures.

    It all is related to negotiation with your self about moving back and forth between two characters and using body and gestures and facial expression,  everything built up to this last little skit.

    Anyhow, my point was that I did this whole thing with very very little anxiety.  I was anxious a bit but someone told me afterward I had very good theaterical qualities, which surprised the hell out of me.    I normally wouldn't be the person to do this without a lot of anxiety but at this age and after all these years it is getting easier and easier to be less nervous in front of a group and more comfortable with myself.

    In fact I wouldn't even be talking about it if it weren't for this work shop.  I did it to earn continuing education unitis which I need to do to maintain my professional certicate.  

    80 hours every 4 years.

    Anyhow,  I've succeded in making myself rush for work.

    Have a good day.
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    I just answered this Featured Question, you can answer it too!

  • Question of the Day?

    One Photo site has consistently rejected, and continues to reject, ALL of my photographs,  except this ONE.

    WHY THIS FISH PIC?

    Other than the size,  and I still don't get it completely,  I'm not sure why, I didn't do anything differently than the other 4000 + pix on my flickr site.  Most of the rejects say "insufficient dimensions" although several just say for 'technical reasons' or "do not fit our buyer's needs".

    Well,  they don't know that I just happened to have these photos all laying around in cyberspace anyway....

    They have this one for sale,  and all the others went to the "give away free pot",  I allowed it.  I think if people download the free ones a few times, they move them to the 'for sale' pot.  You can opt out of the give away free pile anyway.

    did you know that all photographs have an unregistered assumed copyright that is enforceable by law?  and that photos of identifiable  persons cannot be used without a signed release form UNLESS it is an 'editorial' or 'newsworthy' image? That is how celebs get to be photographed and plastered all over and they can't do anything about it,  they are part of the public "eye". 

    Something's Fishy about this plastic goldfish photo.
    It's a fine kettle of fish.

    I have a big urge, now,  to set my camera to the largest possible setting and go take intentional for sale photos.  Woo Hoo!!!

    The CULT OF THE AMATUER Andrew Keen was RIGHT!!

    BUT WHO GIVES A SHIT?  ISN"T THAT WHAT AMERICA IS ALL ABOUT???
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  • Wednesday, Humpday, and Nothing to Report

    It is supposed to be in the 50's,  and for the past two days it has,  but it is still darn COLD.

    It rained like hell last night.

    They are about to approve the $8.00 toll to drive into Manhattan.   I am glad I don't drive and don't understand why a few people who live here still drive instead of taking public transit.  The subway is by far the fastest way to get anywhere around here. 

    I'm happily Wellbutrin free and don't notice much of a difference.
    (that was such a wierd thing to say; "happily Wellbutrin Free".  I am happy that I no longer am taking a chemical brain altering substance and not noticing a great disparity between how I generally feel now and how I generally felt a month or so ago.  Not that I'm un-happy,  but it is morning and I have to go to work and I'm not one of those YEA< TIME TO GO TO WORK!!!! type of guys....)

    I'm Blogging out of some type of urge to write something again.

    I just made myself a bit depressed by trying to think of something to blog about.

    All of these negative thoughts came up.

    I need a haircut.

    I need to face situational anxiety instead of avoiding the situations,  don't I?

    My thought stream just got murky...  I'm gonna go shit, shave, and shower and face the day like I have no choice.

    oh yeah....  I don't...


    I wouldn't say I was "depressed" though.

    I generally face the day with Chagrin.

    God, I hate that stupid word.
    .
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    Do I generally face the day with chagrin?

    .Every since childhood I've been a bit put out by the things you have to do just BE  here.
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  • If You Believe The THEORY of EVOLUTION:

    Top Stories

    Video exclusive: First-ever images of the world's only flying penguins

    Skimming just feet above the waves, a colony of rare penguins takes to the air - proving they can FLY.

    The incredible snap for a new BBC nature series, Miracles of Evolution, shows the birds zooming across the sea hunting for food.

    They launch themselves down steep icy slopes with an upward curve to get the momentum to take off.

    Then they flap their tiny wings to reach a steady cruising speed before eventually crashing back into the water.


    Film maker Prof Alid Loyas said: "We could hardly believe our eyes. It was amazing."

    "It's the perfect example of Darwin's theory of evolution working in reverse."

    The
    flying penguins - filmed at King George's Island, 1,200 kilometres
    south of the Falklands - are just part of the TV crew's astonishing
    discoveries.

    They also
    found a lizard that swallows itself to deter predators and a species of
    rapping frog that attracts mates by rubbing its hind legs together to
    make music.

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    Thanks to lesley_redd for posting this wonderful article.
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  • But He Has A Dirty Ear

    I have to see if this is dirt on Willow's Ear or not.
    Another photo on sale.

    It might not be a dirty ear,  it might be the blotchy nature of cat skin.

    If you have ever shaved a cat, you would know that they have blotchy skin.
    I have never done this, but you can only imagine....

    One site will accept pix that another site rejects.  There are about 30 listed now... more than I can easily keep track of.

    He has green eyes on this beautiful, although freezing and cold early Spring Day.



    Willow sees the day without expectation nor regret.

    Instant Willow Haiku

    'Animal' is three
    syllables of 'cat', you see
    of this structuring

    no really, here's the instant cat willow hiaku

    green eyes and a wet sniffer
    lives in quiet now
    with no repetition, how?

    (is it totally disgustin to make it rhyme like that?)

    It's a cold yet graceful Sunday in the nestled, bagel munching and coffee sipping crossword attempting metropolis.
    how is it where you live?
    have a wonderful Sunday and give me regrets to tomorrow!
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  • Claiming Bragging Rights!

    Waking up to the news that these photos were accepted and posted for sale a the worst paying stock photo site on the web!  Once I get 300 accepted, they pay more,  but they took 21 out of 26 submissions so far.   Here are some more of the lucky shots:



    I'm Kinda surprised the accepted the flag one,  although, I guess, it is, THE FLAG...

    I'm surprised they took this crystal one,  although I key worded it 'feng shui',  I just don't like it,  it was a last ditch attempt at 11 PM.



    I'm surprised these morning glory vines were accepted, who'd ever buy this and why???
    it isn't framed very well and it's kinda fugly, I think,,  although someone with the idea of ASPIRATION may want to use as these little babies sure strive for the sun...

    by the way,  throwing out some morning glory seeds sure teaches one about striving for success against all odds and never giving up, 
    on some gut level....

    ...but this one surprises me the most.   It's a bit artsy,  and I'm awfully surprised it was accepted,   a similar one, which I thought much better was rejected...


    This is titled  Easter Mourning....


    Since it's ART I don't think the maker of the pills can sue?



    Who's ever going to buy this shot and why on earth would they consider it sellable?

  • I'm A New Junior Photographer

    I've submitted photos for sale to 3 web sites.  I've been off work 2 days with an eye infection.

      I was rejected by one photo sight.  (I'm making myself SIC HAHAHAHA)  limited to 10 submissions a month,  all ten were rejected.

    Another has about 13 on review pending approval or rejected and one has 26, 8 of which have been accepted.   

    They sure are picky and I need to get a better camera.  Most of my BEST VERY BEST shots are TOO SMALL! and you must submit the original.

    I have to get up 10 good shots to submit to the first sight in a month,  they pay well,  the others pay smidgen but getting stock photos and name out there is very cool..

    So far,  these photos are on the web,  by me,  owned and sold royalty free to purchasers of stock photography.  I'm surprised some were accepted...  I hope some sell.  Someone just might need a fish or a budda for the company brochure!  It's cheaper than hiring a photographer these days and this is pretty much how it's done.

    Other than that I have a bad headache, up one side of my neck and down the front of my face bisecting the left eye and just about carving a quarter off of the side of my head, nervending wise. 

    Here are the big 8;  and it took me half the day to find and submit these, along with about 75 others out of my damn 4000 + photos.  No face photos without release forms and many of my favorite good photos are of strangers and their children.  You can't sell those unless they have "editorial" value,  meaning something newsworthy....

    ..

    Well, those are the photos for sell.   I'm surprised they accepted the budda one but I hope someone buys a large print of it for $79,  or perhaps thirty cents if they download it or soemthing... i still don't know what i'm doing,   only they are copyrighted.

    I said I wanted money for the De La Vega shots, and I haven't heard from the girl again.  I hope that means they are talking about it.
    I have had some training in photography,  eons ago before digital cameras were invented, I think...  but other than that, and a lot of practice and an artistic mother,  much is the light, my eye and a moment of luck captured.

    Everybody's got SOMTHING to sell,  right???
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    some interesting insites and a freudian slips interspersed without.