February 27, 2012

  • Oscar Pool: I Voted For The Blacktress ...

    ...am I a racist?   I truly thought that since Streep has had such celebrity, and we have a black president,  that Viola Davis would win.  Of course I haven't seen The Help....  I have only seen 3 of the movies and I don't really care...

     It was an Oscar Party Pool and I didn't win the cash or at least I haven't heard I won any cash...  I left before it was over..

     I drank too much... why do I do that?  I poured Grey Goose until the cows came home....  with club soda....and I ate sweets galore...

       I was so socially anxious seeing everyone I don't ever see and those I see quite often...  

       One person I was really nervous about seeing....  this girl...  we had a slight falling out because she's a dick.

     I avoid people and I avoid confrontations.... so she comes up to me in my face all smiley  "SO ARE WE GOOD?  ARE WE GOOD?"...

      I'm like  "WH, WHA WHAT??" in a comic strip and I just kind I go "...i guess so."  and   that was that...  gosh...

     people scare the hell out of me....  i ran for the vodka and that is not a good thing.  I did not get sick though.

     I put two drinks down and walked away intentionally,  giving myself a break in between... I only had 3 drinks but I poured them myself so it was probably a lot more....

       I did not get sick although I am suffering today.... off of work for once,  nice after an oscar party .... and slept till 11 AM.... I just ate... I need to get outside while the sun is shining but I can tell I have no energy...

     my body just sits here.

      i regretted the invitation, took a proprolol or whatever you call it to reduce anxiety,  and had a good time and was glad I went but drank too much..

      I got at least 6 of the categories correct when I left but someone had 8...  the pot was over $1000.... rats.

     ....  I really don't care about the oscars, it's all so phoney,   but it was nice to have forced myself to get out and mingle with colleagues, friends, .... and not so much so.... since I'm such a social isolate and asocial...

     Do you ever get invited to things and feel a burden that you HAVE to go or you'll be an outcast and never be invited again but would prefer to stay home?     That's me.   shit......  anxiety....

     then afterward,  relief and another time learning that I should force myself... but damn it is uncomfortable and hard and how often I give in to isolation...
    .
    . Thank you Oscar.
    .
    .

Comments (3)

  • I feel you on the having to force yourself to go places. Sometimes I just don't want to go out or see people.

  • I usually like a party but pass on quite a few for one reason or another. I am too tired on the weekends to do EVERYTHING. Sounds like you kind of had fun. And that woman - in your face at a party - are we good - ack!

  • I only saw 2 of the movies and they were also rans. peace, Al

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